First day of Preschool

My baby, my first baby, so grown up.

This day is bittersweet. I am so happy he is ready for school and such a good boy, generally, and loves to learn. However, this is a sign of how fast time is going.

I was a little nervous preparing, me and Vick both were. I was frantically setting out his clothes, all the things for him to take, and praying on the potty Gods that he would be okay in that department.  The truth is, I dont think the nervousness was to do with him and how he would be. It is letting him go a little. He is at an age where he needs to now learn to take instruction from others, learn to make friends on own and so forth.  In that sense, you cannot hover over and it's time.  But how did we get there so fast?

As I dressed him and took his picture, I was thinking just how big he suddenly looks.  On our drive I talked about how I will be back to pick him up and not to worry. He said "otay momma."

As we got to the door, he saw toys and kids. He let go of my hand, shook his teacher's hand and let go of mine. He ran into the class and didn't look back. I left and sat at a coffee shop, here, now, to write my reflection.  And I had to message Vick, as I did...water welled up in the lower cringes of my eye, like a ravine collecting water. I fought the sudden urge to ball...but the emotion is raw. 

I'm not a baby...it's just that my baby is no longer a baby. Awww...my first...so proud.

Xoxoxo

Mommyness is Hard, But It's Worth It

It is easy, it is extremely easy, to acknowledge the hardships and craziness that is motherhood, and parenthood alike (I don't mean to always forget the dads...I just don't know how many daddies are reading this). Anyways, kids are hard, they are relentless, and sometimes don't let you get what you intended to get done in the day. Then your husband comes home, and naively innocent enough,  asks, "so, what did you do today?" That is when you can easily go into a long saga of how no one appreciates how hard this truly is and then cry or pout.

But then, your toddler looks at you and says "mommy I wuvv you." Suddenly you forget that you stepped in poop earlier because he had a potty training accident.

Your baby girl pulls your face in and plants a wet one on you and says "mmmmuah", while grinning her 6-tooth smile. Then you forget, she screamed all day long and didn't let you get to the bathroom.

Then you catch your kids laughing and playing together, signalling for you to join with delightful shrieks of "mommmmmaaaaaa." You immediately forget how all you did was clean and clean a mess that got messed up again.

That's when you realize, who cares how hard it is at times. That is what it takes,  which is a small price for this wickedly amazing family I am blessed with. This is surreal to be surrounded with so much love.  The kids sheer excitement surmounts any verbal reassurance that I would ever need that I am doing a decent job.

They are healthy, happy and cute as hell.  They love me, even when they are nuts!  They tire me by 8pm, for sure, but it is worth it because of how much endless joy they truly give me daily. 

The truth is every hard day has its beauty.

In my case, two.

I love these crazy kids of mine.  Thanks for being awesome my babies. 

Now let's see if we can go one night with no wake-ups...

"What I Have Learned" Series - Featured Mommy: Lisa Huffman

Lisa is an Edmonton resident and mom to gorgeous Nora, 2 years old. While admitting mommy life is busy, this mom loves all it encompasses and shares with us that it does come with learnings but also new joys. She shows us the real side of mommyhood, and how to not get overwhelmed. Lisa shows us to relax and not always stress, that things always work out and it is ok.  Her positive attitude (though she may not call it that) and fun-loving nature make her an amazing mom, and person really.

Lisa has worked as a freelance consultant after having Nora, but just returned back to working full-time as a data analyst at a bank. She admits it is a big adjustment, and that she is just now starting to make a point of doing more stuff for herself moving forward. Hobbies and such are hard to pursue in the early years, and her goal this year, other than career goals, is to read an actual book this year. Yes, her humour and her honesty make for an awesome feature mom for this month. I personally love it!

Here is Lisa's interview.

Did you always know you wanted to be a mom?
Definitely! But really, when we grew up, it was basically unheard of not to, right? In my 20's, I remember wondering if I just wanted to be a mom by default, or if I actually actively wanted to. It turns out the biological close is real, yo.

What would you say is your biggest learning(s) since being a mom?
Oh my God, so much. I was really surprised how much it actually changes you, in so many ways. I hope this doesn't sound pretentious, but for me, seeing the world through the eyes of a parent is so totally different than before having kids. It seems so much more dangerous, terrifying and sad sometimes, and so much more magical and amazing other times. And you get to have to guide, these precious little souls through it all, until they can do it on their own. That's a pretty heavy responsibility to carry, and I don't think I really grasped it until she was here.

What, if anything, was the hardest about transitioning to mommyhood?

Basically just adjusting to being a role model 24/7! I've always been pretty jaded and sarcastic, and I'm realizing that it's not cool to download that onto your kids. So for me, it's trying to turn that off when my daughter is around and try to be a little more optimistic. I want her to CHOOSE to be jaded and sarcastic on her own terms!

What is your favourite thing to do with your child?

We spend a lot of family time on bike rides or at the lake or river. I have a child seat on my bike and I absolutely love riding around together. My daughter loves going fishing with her dad and digging in the sand and mud. At home, we do a lot of colouring and building Lego.

Any particular funny or insightful stories?

My daughter was 17 days late. 17 days! And no, her due date was not off. My midwife and I were both just stumped. I felt like I was being punked. It was insane. Nora basically came at the last possible minute - we had plans to meet at the hospital for an induction/c-section the following morning, and I went into labour that night. Everything went great and she came out perfect - I say she got her dad's sense of time.

What advice would you give to new moms?

For those first few months - do not worry about what the books say! Everything will be fine. Whatever you are doing, it is totally fine.​ There is no such thing as a textbook baby. You are the expert on your own child. From the very beginning of my pregnancy until Nora turned 1, I freaked out approximately 85,000 times. None of those fears ever came to fruition. So I would say of course you will be worried about this or that, but don't let it get in those amazing first few weeks. They are really special. Also, spend that time exactly how you want to. Don`t worry about visitors, relatives, friends - they can wait. Everyone wants to see/hold the baby, and everyone has advice for you. Take it and leave it on your own terms. You get to decide what works for your family. I recommend reading about the fourth trimester, I found it a really useful way to approach those early days.

Is there any item or anything in general you would say is a must-have or must-do for parents? and why?

​We both really liked our adjustable carrier (we got one that is good from newborn to 30 lbs) - we never bothered with a stroller until she was older because it was nice just snuggling her while we walked, ran errands whatever. My husband wore her most of the time and it was a really nice bonding thing for them.

I cannot say enough how much I enjoyed interviewing Lisa. Her "go with the flow and enjoy the ride" mantra is so true. She is all we need to hear about just doing our best and choosing what works best for yourselves and not defending your choices to anyone. In the end, it's pointless to get sucked into pre-conceived notions, it will all be OK. Enjoy and be true to yourself.

Thanks Lisa.

Lisa and her beauty, Nora

This New Journey...

Becoming a mother, I thought, was my biggest change to happen in my life. Transitioning from a selfish point of view to completely putting others needs first (from a taking care of standpoint that is), is something that seems like a huge change.  It was, that is for sure. However, I was semi-prepared and, albeit nervous, was just ok with whatever unknowns it came with. 

Now I realize that is not the biggest challenge or new feat. I have taken on a new challenge, a new journey, a new feat...if you will.

After maternity, we decided it was best for me not to return to my job. The kids are so young and with daycare demands, the fact Caiden will be starting preschool, and scarce babysitting,  is it ideal?  I, however, need to work. That is a given. Do I now go back begrudgingly and unsure of my next steps in my career? Wonder if it is still in the right direction for me, quieting that voice in me saying you aren't following your passion and path? Or continue feeling uncertainty in my true self? 

The answer was no.  

It was screaming NO.

However, loud that no was, I needed courage and a plan. I realized quickly that what I needed was to work from home. Regardless of that, I needed to do it on my own...part of all that came writing.  Writing is what I love. I love to create for people, for myself and for my mind.  

I need to do this. I mean how long am I going to wonder what I can do and/or should do next? It is fine to follow a path, but when it is time to re-evaluate that path, one must listen.  For your happiness depends on it.

I need to reignite my passion for helping people through really finding ways to share my tips on how to stay healthy, even for the busy moms out there. I need to explore my drive to write, for people and myself. I need to continue looking at managing projects and events,  planning and organizing, as some skills I excel in.

I need to finally become a freelance writer/ contractor. 

So I did.

This is so new, this start of my life doing freelance writing, editing, projects and, possibly, events.  It is scary to not know what type of income it will generate and if I will be a success. However, I need to try.  And it is time I try.

So many moments I thought, "am I crazy?"  Who leaves a corporate job with a steady pay cheque for a world of the unknown and unsteady?

A lot of moms.

It may be tough but if this is something I have been thinking about forever, and I want to teach my kids to do what they love, then it is about time. 

So here I am.  On this new journey, scared,  nervous, and optimistic. I will need to network,  hustle, be creative and market. I will need to work late hours on many nights and penny-pinch at first. I will question my sanity along the way. However, I am finally following what I feel is right, at least for now. It may change,  but this is me, at this juncture in my life.

I conquered the new mom phase, and now it's time for me to do the new mompreneur phase. 

So here we go...

For any writing, editing,  or project/event management needs please feel free to message me directly. 

Look for me on www.turningmommy.com, www.modernmama.com/Vancouver.

Smoked Salmon Spaghettini

Recently my parents took a little vacation over to Queen Charlotte Island, good ol' West coast Islands.  Whenever they go away to the island, they often return with some fresh goodness for all of us.  They didn't disappoint, with fresh (I mean super fresh) smoked salmon.  It was delicious, perfectly pink, soft, cool, separates with a fork and so moist.  I also love salmon because of the fact you are getting your Omega fats, essential fatty acids, so easily.  

I enjoyed the salmon multiple ways: with eggs for breakfast, in a summer salad with greens, in a wrap, or just as is.  However, I wanted to try something different with the remaining amount.  I set out to make a summer smoked salmon pasta...spaghettini to be specific.

You guys...delic!!  De-fricking-licious.  My kids ate it up, and my 3-year old actually said "mmm momma decious" (him trying to pronounce delicious is insanely cute).

So if you are a smoked salmon lover, why don't you try this family friendly recipe out.  Super easy, healthy (of course), filling, and even kids will eat it.  All of my meal goals - check.

Ingredients:

1 pkg whole wheat spaghettini

1 tablespoon olive oil

1 small onion, finely chopped

5-6 garlic cloves, pressed

1 large tomato

1 handful baby spinach

1 handful kalamata olives

2 filets smoked salmon

garlic powder - to taste

salt - to taste

pepper - to taste

oregano - to taste

1 tablespoon basil pesto (optional)

2 teaspoons lemon juice

feta cheese - to taste

Directions:

Make whole wheat spaghettini, ensure you add olive oil while boiling it.  Drain, and set aside.

In a seperate pot, sautee garlics and onions (optional to use margarine or none).

Once sauteed (onions are translucent), add chopped fresh tomatoes, chopped baby spinach, and kalamata olives.

Add the smoked salmon, shredded.

Mix and cook until vegetables are slightly soft.

Add the pasta back in.

Add seasonings to taste:  garlic powder, salt, pepper, oregano.

Mix well. 

Optional tip:  Add a tablespoon of basil pesto at this point as well and mix.

Add lemon juice, drizzle slightly.

Once everything is coated, mixed well and cooked together, top with feta.  Close the lid and take off the heat.

It's done, it's great, it's easy...it's so yum.  Serve with a side salad, this makes a perfect summer dinner.

Enjoy!

5 Foods I Love That My Kids Love

At some point, all, well I don't know about all, but I hear, kids go through a "picky eater" phase. When they are learning to eat they are blissfully unaware and open to putting basically anything in their mouths. As they get older, they develop more resistance, despite your best attempt to expose them to everything.

Caiden had recently gone through that and just starting to come back around, though still a few hurdles to go. I noticed my anxiety of him getting enough nutrition getting quite high. Though this is a common stage, I couldn't help it. Well, I am always on the hunt for healthy snacks and creating simple things in the kitchen, that is still yummy and nutritious.

Here are 5 things that I am so thankful that both kids enjoy, because I can always jam pack some nutrition in there.

1.  Pancakes and/or French Toast This is great, so I can pack in some wholesome items in the batters. I opt to add things like chia, flax, and berries and other fruit. Doing so, they eat it up without flinching. A really great item to use here is Seedibles. A tonne of fibre and protein, makes a one-dimensional food more versatile in its nutrition profile.

2.  Crunchy Foods They love things that go "crunch". So I try to include some crunch in snacks to make sure they have snacks they will actually eat. Things like cucumbers and carrots go over well.  Popcorn and chips are of course desired...so what I learned to do is make things like pita chips and kale chips at home.  It's a hit!! Just take these items, break into chip sized amounts, place on a baking sheet, add olive oil and choice seasoning and back to a crisp.

3.  Smoothies Not much to say here. They call it milkshakes, I use only fruit and milk and/or yogurt...add some extra stuff like flax or Seedibles and awesomeness!! Add in a nut butter and BAM you got yourself some healthy fats and protein to boot!

4.  Rice or Pasta This is kind of a hidden trick. I'm not big on trickery...but hey, it has made me sigh with relief, so whatever!  For some reason, starch was never a questionable food to Caiden, but he went through a phase of not wanting to eat meat or eggs etc. Now when I make rice or pasta, I mix in the veggies and the protein food all together and it goes down pretty easy. Works well with eggs, meat, fish, legumes or lentils and any cook-able veggies.

5.  Yogurt I love yogurt, not the sugar packed kind, it has such great things like calcium, protein, and probiotics.  So knowing they enjoy it, makes me super pleased. I make it fun still by doing things like mixing it with fruit and freezing it, so they think its yogurt candy...food can be fun too.

So that's 5 things that help with even the pickiest of eaters at my home.  

This mom can go to bed happy that they got some nutrition during their day...I can't help it.

Why I Started Letting my 2 year old Sleep in Our Bed - a guest post

I recently had the pleasure of talking with Bee, of Smart Baby Activities. This website is awesome, it shows various sensory and developmental activities great for your babies (ranges from newborn to 12 months), as well as all milestones (cognitive, motor, language). I had to ask her to do a guest post here, as we shared a lot of similarities in views of child rearing.


Here is Bee's post, about "Why I Started Letting my 2 year old Sleep in Our Bed"


Sleep is really important to me. Wait, let me start that over. That sounds really selfish.
My baby’s sleep is really important to me. And, yes, you got me, so is my sleep- but it is secondary….seriously…

Sleep to me was very important because I believed it to be an essential part of my baby’s growth and development- both physically and cognitively. I imagined sleep was when everything she learned was reinforced, gave her mind a chance to relax from that day’s experiences (cuz let’s face it, this world is a LOT to take in), and give her body a chance to grow. I knew I wanted 3 things when it came to her sleep:
1. Have her be able to sleep in her own crib and eventually bed
2. Not have to rock her all night when she woke up
3. I did not want to achieve 1 and 2 via the cry-it-out method

A few reasons behind the 3 above. #1 was because I felt sleep was important for her developmentally, so I knew she would need to be comfortable enough to sleep on her own- aka not rely on me or other means, such as rocking- which leads to #2, which is a blend of the reason behind #1 and selfish reasons. But, I also didn’t want sleep to be such a BIG deal. I wanted it to be a natural, no fuss thing for her that she could do independently. As for the cry it out method, I do not judge negatively parents that implore this method. I just knew I, personally, didn’t have the heart for it.

So, with these 3 goals in mind, I began to read and read and therefore, became more educated on the subject. My #1 goal equated to people saying babies need to “self soothe” themselves when sleeping. I also learned about object permanence and how it makes baby’s falling asleep on their own near impossible. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you’ll also want to read more about what other parents don’t tell new parents about.

Long story short, my husband and I ended up using the swing method, which is essentially: let the swing rock her to sleep, wean down how much it swings until it is at 0 and she still falls asleep, and then transition her to her own crib. Sounds easy and straightforward, but man was it a grueling process. We had to be very disciplined even when failure felt like it occurred every week with all the sicknesses and set backs. But, we did it! And, at a year, we transitioned her into her own room (which was heartbreaking for me). Prior to that, her crib was in our room. I only “let her go” because again, sleep was important to me for my baby.

Then she turned 2 years old. She started sleeping in our bed. What happened?

Well, first we achieved our goal. So, that allowed a bit of wiggle room, meaning it allowed a bit of what I wanted to happen- I love cuddling with her. She’s the most adorable girl in the world, who, impossibly gets more adorable when she sleeps. I know this phase won’t last long, and I want to soak it all up and build wonderful memories for as long as I can.

So, I’m sure you’re going to ask: “well didn’t this thought apply at the very beginning?” Yes, of course it did. But, I didn’t let my selfish reasons supersede what I thought was best for her. At that point, I did what I had to do, to achieve what I, as a parent, decided was important for my little one. When she reached two, however, after a good year of solidifying the habit of her falling asleep on her own and putting herself back to sleep when she wakes up without crying, I figured….why not?

So, I balance it. Well, at least that is my justification. She still has to go to bed in her own room by herself- so we still practice this. And then, when she wakes up in the middle of the night, we bring her to our bed for some cuddles. It’s so funny now. She knows what will happen because she pops up, calls Daddy to come get her, and sits their waiting to be picked up (all stuffed animals in hand). And, every now and then, we tell her it’s still too early to come to Mommy and Daddy’s bed, and she has to fall back asleep in her own bed. When this happens, I tell myself that she still has the skill that she can flex any time.

Who cares if she’s a little dependent on us and wants to be with us. I can give her that. The only thing I have to remind myself is that I need to be sure I double check myself and make sure things are balanced. I have to ask myself: “Am I doing this for her betterment, or will this be enjoyable for her and/or me for this period of time but in the long run not be the best for her?” And then I act accordingly. For me, this same concept applies to other things, like spoiling her (when, how, and why) or giving her candy….

Yeah…I know you know what I mean. That’s a tough one. Especially when she sees all her nieces and nephews getting it so easily. I would love to cave in 100% of the time because it makes her so happy, but I know, in the long run, it is not a good habit for her body to always taste sugar. And, that it’s a good thing to delay gratification some times.

Clearly, my thoughts on sleeping will differ from others. Both my sisters had their kids sleep in their bed from day 1 until they had to wean them to their own bed around age 4/5 years old and up. And, obviously they got quality sleep and have grown to be amazing, intelligent kids. My point is that every parent will have different thresholds or different areas that this applies to. And for me, it is important to keep my personal goal as a parent in sight.

So, even though my quality of sleep isn’t the best compared to when she sleeps in her own bed because I wake up to check on her, cover her up, and she kicks me and my husband in the eye- I love having us all 3 sleep in the same bed, with the best part being when we all 3 wake up together. Her smiling, just-woke-up face is the best thing to open my eyes to each and every morning.



About guest blogger, Bee- I am one of the contributors/founders of smartbabyactivites. I love being a Mom. It is hard and challenging…and…I love it. I also want to help other parents as I think community and helping others is key to life. We focus on activities you can do with your baby that contributes to their growth and development. Here is an example article series on vision in babies and developmental activities.

Thank you so much to Christina for letting me contribute to this wonderful blog.